Another Thanksgiving coming

About 15 years ago, an incident change my life, my kids lives.

Today, here we are again, and this time, it's mind boggling. I thought the lies and deceit was done. But that was then. This is now. Is it any different? Maybe, but I really don't know anymore. How can it be truth when I don't really know if he's really telling the truth. The whole truth. At this point, it's not about him anymore. My counselor told me to let him go. The most important people I need to concentrate on are the kids. That's the bottome line.

The kids can't take the lies anymore. They can't trust him. They don't even want to talk to him. He didn't even call... The little one has no clue, but I'm sure he has an idea that something is not right. Not anymore.

I don't really like to air out the laundry in social networks... even blogging like this. I have to stop. Think. And then decide what to write without people knowing what is really going on.

For those of you who I already spoke to, you know. And it's hard. I have to stop trying to make sense about all this and move on. That's what people have told me today. Move on. Take care of the kids. They are priority.

When he's ready to be on the same page, then I'll consider. Until then, I can't believe anything he says.

He'll always be this. Always be tainted because he allowed it to happen over and over again. It's not like cancer or catching a cold. This. This is different.

If God said that He was throwing a few more challenges my way, I don't think I would've taken that route. But I don't have a choice on how they all happened. It just did. Now how do I handle it from here? That's the challenge.

Forgiveness will come. Just not yet. I'm not ready. Trust is certainly on the back burner.

So here we are again. Another Thanksgiving that is full of mixed emotions. I guess what I can say is that I am thankful it happened. The kids are aware and will not take it anymore. Thank you God for allowing that to happen. Make him take responsibility for his actions. Consequences on the way and then healing.. IF he has faith in himself to heal.

For the kids. Don't do it. Just don't.